Been ages since I last dusted the cobwebs off this stagnating blog which has, admittedly, known better days in the past when updates were less sporadic. Well, nevertheless, as 2010 starts, I think its time again for me to review the year that passed and list(not obey please note!) some of my wishes for the new year/decade.
2009 marked the first year of NSF life.
Well, despite my initial grouses and grumblings,
I somehow survived through BMT and SISPEC before eventually OOC-ing in armour and ending up in this crap place known as S********.
Reflecting back on my first year in NS,
I must grudgingly admit that I learnt alot and changed me quite a bit.
I learnt to get along better with people from various backgrounds and learnt how to deal with people without incurring their wrath.
NS also made me tougher(not that im tough in any way...) and encouraged me to exercise much more than I used to and that if I could survive NS, i would be able to handle issues in my everyday life.
Perhaps what I am most grateful for are the great friends I made in BMT/SISPEC/TTW.
Its the company that made life in army much more bearable and fun.
And of course its the company that made me realise that yes, sadly, I am quite bitchy/bimbotic at times compared to some.
But there are some who made me realise that hey, there is always a higher mountain somewhere!!
We may not meet up as often as we like but when we do, its great that we all have a great time hanging out together and sharing stories about each other lives.
To those who I consider more than army friends(you all should know who you all are!)
Im sure that even after ORD(coming soon thank goodness) we will still keep in touch:D
Moving on, 2009 was also the year of A level results and university applications.
My dismal results were a source of immense disappointment for me but Im glad that I had actively participated in school events in my 4 years in TJC which allowed me to enter a course which I was keen in. Looking back, I admit I did not apply myself as much I could have but now that that chapter in my life has closed, it is time for me to look foward to a new chapter and work hard from now on.
As for my JC friends
I know I am busy with army and you all are busy with university or your own army lives, but i am so glad we still take time out for each other to meet and have fun together like we once used to do in school. The meetings may not be daily like they used to be, but the feeling of closeness and familiarity has not eroded. thanks for cheering me up through my bmt days and a level results and for always being a friend around me:D
to my three closest primary school friends, 10 years since we met. let there be many more 10 years to come:D
to my grandad who left me just before my A level results, Im sorry you didnt get to see me pass out and im sorry you suffered for so long before moving on.
I love you and miss you deeply.
to me!
I resolve to be nicer/kinder/more sympathetic...
ah who am I kidding?!
I resolve to spend more time with family and friends as well as working hard for uni! not to forget keeping fit:D!
2009 was quite good!
Here is to a better 2010!!!:D
..+.. Feeling dreamy ..+.. [6:15 PM]
i don't like to show it much. But betrayal of a friend is to me as sinful as killing a person. I'm just so tired of the perverse banal things that some people do. To claim to be a sage or a saint would be preposterous of me, but the sight of those who i call my friends having no qualms in forsaking us when the going gets tougi just makes me sad. Hackneyed indeed. Im just so disillusioned.
..+.. Feeling dreamy ..+.. [3:39 PM]
And the tears flowed torrential.
Somehow my usual arguments with my brother over itty bitty issues pale in comparison
..+.. Feeling dreamy ..+.. [3:54 PM]
Randomly decided to drop by my primary school tonight since it was hosting some fun fare event and my brother was going anyway.
As I wandered along the corridors and alleyways of what was once a familiar environment to me, inherently fervently wishing to relieve memories that once were, I discovered to my chagrin that my final moments of a momentous chapter in my life had indeed passed and that relieving them would take far more than a hollow structure for it was the people that made the concrete jungle special...
Many of those who taught me have retired with more set to follow.
In the absence of my classmates and teachers,
the school suddenly seemed so alien.
A monstrous grotesque structure which I struggled to identify with.
Dark clouds loomed overhead, bringing along with them gusts of chilling cold wind.
Pertinent, I thought,
Just like the weather to reverberate my inner feelings.
Forlornly, i gazed wistfully upon the classrooms that I once hailed as mine
the pond which i gleefully teased fishes in
the canteen which me and my friends used to argue about where to sit for the day.
The cold wind caressed my skin as it upped its velocity
yet in spite of my looming gloom, I saw that perhaps,
perhaps that some things never would change.
The innocent laughter of the children
the playful chasing around the school
the wild shouts of joy
the same arguments over where to sit with friends...
Water dripped onto my arm
and I,despite my many grouses,
discovered that innately it mattered little what had changed
and what had remained
for as long I had my memories from so long ago,
the school for its fancy grandiose and outlandish facades,
would be in my heart,
still the happy place I spent my primary school days with great friends and teachers
And that I was truly sorry that my one night of remembrance was cut short by the weather.
Looking up, I chuckled deeply as I realised that the water was simply of a spilt cup from the second floor.
And munching on popcorn,
I continued walking around the school,
this time, looking for memories yes,
but for the new ones to bring back while the old ones reamined,
forever in my heart.
To APS Class 6/10 2002
..+.. Feeling dreamy ..+.. [12:52 AM]
Because seeing you once again just brings torrents of memories which I blissfully indulge myself in.
Because. Just because.
..+.. Feeling dreamy ..+.. [3:52 PM]
I wish passwords could just be my fingerprints!
Took me so long to enter this blog!
On the other hand,
my course is starting soon....
..+.. Feeling dreamy ..+.. [11:53 PM]
so many things have happened in army.
BMT. SISPEC. Armour. OOC-ing. Revocating. downing pes.(yes excuse my english!)
And I realised that despite my incessant whining and moaning about how tough/boring/cruel/painful/tiring army has been,
I did truly have a great time so far thanks to the wonderful people I encountered along the way who made my jounrey far less agonising then it could have been.
(To the effed up people who ruined my mood countless of times: You all are lucky my temper died down alot since enlisting!)
After so many weeks of being an OOC(saikang warrior!)
I realised to my amazement that learning nothing in army is perhaps just as, if not more, painful than being a trainee.
The mindless routine which numbs the mind and soul and the constant bickering and power struggle in the office sickens and wearies me as time goes on.
I do miss my SISPEC BSLC section and platoon where I met many great people.
It was perhaps one of my biggest regrets OOCing from armour because it meant that I would no longer be with them anymore,
but i guess parting ways is part and parcel in life and to be perfectly politically correct,
armour just was not the cup of tea for me.
Heading on to my new posting in sembawang camp as a transport supervisor,
I will always recall the days of chiong sua-ing as a section, being punished, the scoldings, the numerous 'horlans' and mistakes we made along my BMT and BSLC days as long as the instructors who guided us along the way.
I can't explain why(amazingly for me!) but there is this lingering sense of regret that I was posted to this certain camp in the west far far away from civilisation.
Perhaps if I were posted to another camp....
Yet, life goes on.
I have learnt alot in army and grown(i think?! haha) as an individual and met great people along the way.
I miss them alot and i do hope we can meet up next time if any of you ever have the chance to come upon this blog?! Haha.
Naturally guys, all the best in passing out la! Dont give up k!
At last,
I guess I truly understand and grasp why so many say NS was one of their best experience in their lives.
The pain and suffering is very little compared to the friendship you gain through the difficult times together.
Lets go!
..+.. Feeling dreamy ..+.. [11:39 PM]
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